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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22757239">Baby You're So Classic</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/high_warlock_of_brooklyn/pseuds/high_warlock_of_brooklyn'>high_warlock_of_brooklyn</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>All of them have one single brain cell and Raphael has it's custody, Alternate Universe - Human, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, I honestly don't know how Raphael puts up with these guys, Jace and Simon are chaotic together, M/M, Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day Fluff, pop culture references</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 11:20:37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,943</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22757239</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/high_warlock_of_brooklyn/pseuds/high_warlock_of_brooklyn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Simon gets dragged to the group Valentine's Day dinner by his best friend, and just when he thought he just might enjoy this dinner, Clary's girlfriend's insufferable brother joins them. </p>
<p>Turns out, Simon doesn't mind the insufferable presence, especially when he gets to play a prince.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Clary Fray/Isabelle Lightwood, Helen Blackthorn/Aline Penhallow, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Simon Lewis/Jace Wayland</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>148</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Valentine's Day 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Baby You're So Classic</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Happy reading!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Oh come on Fray! Why do I have to go with you?” A whine comes from behind the giant canvass sitting in the middle of Clary’s studio, followed by a bespectacled face poking out, brown hair sticking out about every which way. “Fray!” Simon whines again, and is promptly rewarded with a smack on the head with a paintbrush. “Ow! That hurt!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Good,” Clary scowls, her fiery red hair spilling all over her tiny face. She furiously puffs at the strands of hair spilling all over her face, hands sticky with paint. “You’ve been down ever since Maia dumped you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not down!” Simon protests vehemently. “I’m just...you know....” he waves his hands around, “...coping.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Endless Doctor Who marathons are not coping Si! It’s called moping!” Clary glares. “Come on. I really think a night out will make you feel better. Everyone is coming, Si! Even Raphael is coming!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“There’s no way Raphael freaking Santiago is coming to a gathering of humankind voluntarily,” Simon deadpans.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, you’re right,” Clary sighs. “Magnus threatened to douse all his jackets in glitter if he doesn’t come to the dinner.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon nods solemnly, “That’ll do it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Si, you have to come though. The whole family is coming!” Clary puts down the paintbrush, not noticing the smear of yellow paint on her palm. Simon hides a fond smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Three couples and Raphael do not make a family gathering Fray!” Simon hangs his head, and Clary pats her best friend’s back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well technically, it’s three couples, Raphael, you and Jace.” Clary ducks down to avoid the swat Simon sends her way. “Trust me, Jace is lovely once you give him a chance. You’ve met him one time Si!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Exactly!” Simon glares at her. “And that was one too many meets! Or are we ignoring how he made fun of The Doctor and said Yoda is basically what Alec might turn into in a thousand years?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, and Magnus put a hundred rubber ducks in his room for that, we all know the story.” Clary waves it off. “But he’s Izzy’s brother, Si, and you are basically mine. I want you to be friends with him, or at least, try to.” Clary gives Simon her best puppy face.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fine. I’ll put in my best effort.” Simon sighs. “But if he says anything about Han or Leia then I’m not responsible for any of the harsh words that will follow.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re the best! I love you! So! Much!” Clary hugs Simon, bouncing up and down, her small frame shaking Simon’s own. Simon mumbles something about overly enthusiastic best friends being the cause of death of young promising humans, but hugs her back anyway.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, so the dinner is tomorrow at 7, at the Hunter’s Moon. I’ll pick you up at 6.” The redhead sticks up six fingers in front of his face. “So you better be ready! And please put on something that doesn’t have mustard spilled on it, please?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That was one time!” Simon lets out a betrayed gasp, “And I’m never gonna apologize for mustard sandwich. Not now, not ever.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh my god,” Clary rolls her eyes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Call me Simon.” The cheeky smile Simon flashes at his best friend does nothing to soften her glare. Sometimes Simon wonders how a small person like Clary can contain so much anger. But then he remembers the Lightwoods’ pet cat Church, and Clary doesn’t seem weird anymore.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Simon Lewis.” Clary narrows her eyes, and Simon feels tempted to take a step back. “You are going to put on a nice, clean shirt and a jacket, and then you’re gonna wait for me to pick you up at 6, and then you’re gonna go to that dinner and try to be friends. Or I will hold all your collectibles hostage. I wonder if my YouTube subscribers wanna see me paint over a Baby Yoda funko pop doll.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The hell Fray?!” Simon squeaks at his childhood best friend. “You’re going full on Umbridge on me!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Listen to me, and I won’t have to go up to Voldemort level.” Clary opens the door for Simon to leave, “Trust me, you don’t want me to go Dark Lord.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“God, Fray.” Simon gets out the door. “I swear sometimes you scare me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know.” Clary smirks, before breaking out in a grin. “See you tomorrow!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>_______________________________________</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It’s not the first time Simon has wondered if being best friends with Clary Fray will cause his demise. Every time something happens, like stealing Jocelyn’s expensive, one-of-a-kind hand-painted tarot card collection and replacing them with her own, because </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘the Cup should be more angelic!’</span>
  </em>
  <span>, or like breaking and entering in the haunted Hotel DuMort near the edge of the town at a ripe age of 12 to get ‘the aesthetics for a new painting’, or going against the YouTube patrons called the Clave to make sure all artist gets their due credit. No wonder he just waits for her to grab him on a new rebellion nowadays. He was honestly disappointed when there was no vampire lurking about in the DuMort, just a crazy old lady with crazy green eyes, dirty and stringy blond hair, wearing a dirty and torn brown dress that could have been an expensive red once, who tried to bite Simon, according to Clary, though to this day Simon swears she was only flirting with him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That’s what has been on Simon’s mind the whole day, vampires, mysterious old ladies, and haunted houses from the 60s. No wonder he dresses up as a noir vampire, black shirt, black slacks, and a black jacket with a wonderful carolina blue and brown embroidery that Raphael gifted him on his last birthday.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Say what you will about Raphael Santiago, the man knows his suit jackets.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When Clary shows up in her step dad’s jeep, it’s ten minutes past six. She looks beautiful, her red curls in a stylish braid, with small tufts of hair spilling from the sides aesthetically. Her black dress has little purple columbines embroidered on it, and Simon gives her a fond smile before pulling her in a warm hug.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You look amazing, Fray! Isabelle would be stunned.” Simon grins at his best friend. “Get in, Si.” Clary says quickly, trying to hide her face that’s almost as red as her hair.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The drive to Hunter’s Moon is filled with random talk. Simon has always been a talker, and there are very few people in this world who can actually keep up with his constant stream of chatter, Clary being one of them. That’s how they first became friends, the most talkative boy of the class, the tiny redhead girl who wouldn’t let others bully him because of his glasses. They had gotten along famously, Simon quickly becoming her best friend, actually, her first friend after Jocelyn moved to New York from the small town Idris, after a nasty divorce with Clary’s birth father.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon spots Helen’s beautiful blond hair from the door, as the usher brings them to their table. Aline is sitting next to her wife, one of her hands around Helen’s waist, Helen wearing an LBD, and Aline simple gold dress, talking sweetly between themselves. Raphael is sitting at the head of the table, typing away in his phone, his face adorned with a scowl.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Over years, Simon has learned to differentiate between Raphael’s scowls, and he has so many! There’s the ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m not interested in this social drama</span>
  </em>
  <span>’ scowl, where his eyelids droop one quarter more than his normal appearance, there’s the ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m not interested in this romantic drama</span>
  </em>
  <span>’ scowl, where his forehead gets two extra creases, then there’s the ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>touch my friends and I will personally send you to hell</span>
  </em>
  <span>’ scowl, where his eyes go all steely and Simon feels a little scared for the person that glare is directed to.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Then there’s the ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>these are idiots in love who would drag me around because I’m clearly the only one with a single brain cell in this group but I wouldn’t have it any other way because these are MY idiots</span>
  </em>
  <span>’ scowl, where his eyes shine a little brighter and his lips quirk upwards from time to time, the one he’s wearing right now. That’s how Simon knows he appreciates Simon wearing the jacket he gifted him, and Simon gives him a blinding smile in return.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Now the tiny quirk of Raphael’s lips would have been more enjoyable, if it hadn’t been the brown leather jacket popping up in Simon’s vision, complete with a flop of all too familiar blond hair. (Yes, Simon may or may not have went to a certain person’s Instagram to prove that they are as narcissistic as Simon thinks, and he may or may not have spent almost three hours there, but that was all for research only)</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just when I thought this dinner might actually be fun.” Jace narrows his mismatched blue and brown eyes at Simon, who scowls in return.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The feeling’s mutual, Herondale.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ay Dios Mio!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span> Raphael shakes his head at the two of them, his face currently sporting scowl no 1.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh come on Raph! The whole group’s together! Don’t be so grumpy!” Magnus arrives, his fashion sense impeccable as always, as well as his love for glitter, and Simon makes a mental note not to go near Magnus’ glittery midnight blue pants during the night. Alec smiles quietly from his side where Magnus has a hand slung across his waist, dressed in sombre dark blue button up and black slacks, with a black jacket. They make quite the pair, Simon thinks, remembering how Alec came out to his parents during his graduation party by kissing Magnus in front of them, just after Robert had tried to ‘introduce’ him to Lydia. It’s only been a month of them dating, but it had been clear they are together for the long haul.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Isabelle arrives, fashionably late, her purple knee length flowy dress with stitched with handcrafted violets, perfectly complimenting Clary. She goes over to greet her furiously blushing girlfriend, pecking her lips before sitting down next to her. Magnus takes the seat closest to Raphael, Alec sitting next to him, Aline and Helen facing the two of them, Clary and Isabelle next to them, which leaves Simon to seat next to...</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Oh great. This is gonna be a </span>
  <em>
    <span>fun</span>
  </em>
  <span> night. Ugh.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>_______________________________________________</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So, you’re Clary’s best friend?” Jace gets started on his salad. “Did she threaten you to come?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh yes!” Simon widens his eyes, “She was a robe and a bad nose job away from Voldemort. Did Izzy threaten you too?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yup.” Jace nods solemnly, “She told me she’ll replace my whole wardrobe with duck-printed ones.” Izzy gives a triumphant smile, earning a kiss from her girlfriend.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay what is up with you and ducks?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alec snorts, and Jace turns to glare at his brother. “Hey! At least my phobia has a name! I don’t make fun of your weird fear of umbrellas!” Jace stabs an accusatory finger and Alec sputters.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, anatidaephobia, which is what someone like you would come up with. At least I don’t scream like a child if a duck chases me! They are so sweet!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They are evil demons!” Jace shudders.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s actually a Herondale thing. One of his ancestors actually wrote a book about it.” Magnus smirks.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“There’s a book too?” Simon winces. “Honestly I’m learning so much about ducks today.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh yeah!” Aline laughs. “I showed it to Magnus when I was working part time at the library.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No way!” Simon smiles at Aline. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes way. That’s actually how I met Helen.” Aline turns and kisses her cheek, and Helen flushes, a blinding smile on her face.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes. I borrowed The Greatest Works of Oscar Wilde. This cute librarian put a note in there.” A soft smile lingers on Helen’s face. “My brother needed a lift home, so I forgot about it. Until I got to the middle of the book, and saw the note again. Went to the library as soon as I could. Asked her out on a date. She said yes.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>The curves of your lips rewrite history. The world is changed because you are made of ivory and gold.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Aline muses.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oscar Wilde, huh? You’ve got a lot of nerve.” The blonde smiles.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I do.” Aline and Helen share a knowing look.</span>
  <em>
    
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m working at the library part-time too actually,” Simon clears his throat, once the moment passes. “Till my band gets famous. Or my graphic novel. Whichever happens first.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Band </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>a comic? Wow!” Jace rolls his eyes, and Simon turns to glare at him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, my apologies Mr Herondale.” Simon narrows his eyes. “I expected to appreciate art and culture, my bad.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh I appreciate art, alright. Just not overly nerdiness.” Jace gives him a sarcastic smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He appreciates art and culture, Simon, don’t let that vintage leather jacket and scowl fool you. He’s an award winning pianist. And has a book club.” Izzy pipes up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You read?” Simon looks like he just saw a bubblegum pink tiger with white stripes. “You, Jace Herondale, read?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, why does everyone find that so hard to believe!” Alec snorts, and Magnus giggles, and Izzy joins them too. Even Raphael smirks a little.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know what to tell you, man. Must be the leather.” Simon shakes his head. “Anyway, pianist, huh?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes. Go on, make fun of it.” Jace sits back in his chair, waiting for Simon to comment. His chin jutted out defiantly, perfect blond hair flopped on the side of his face. There’s a voice in the back of Simon’s head telling him how much Jace looks like a rebel prince right now, ready to abdicate against the wishes of the king to save a life. Simon doesn’t know who has made Jace feel this way, like he has to defend every single thing about him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Actually, I was gonna ask you if you wanted to play with me.” Simon shrugs. “I have a solo recording next week, and as much as I like Eric and the others, truth is, they are not up to the task. And it’s a special song, it would sound better with piano anyway. I could use an award winner. ” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jace regards Simon with a peculiar look for a moment, then picks up Simon’s phone from the table, typing fast. “There. You have my number. And I know this must be hard, because I mean, look at all this,” Jace gestures at his own face, “But don’t send booty calls.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh no, how will I ever survive,” Simon deadpans. “Is he always this humble?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You should see him in front of a mirror.” Alec mutters. The whole table laughs, and even Jace smirks a little. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The rest of the dinner goes smoothly, Jace and Simon trying to outdo each other with ridiculous comments. Turns out, they both prefer pineapples on pizza, and the whole table boos at them. Jace shares a story about the time all of his siblings tried to cook for him on his birthday, and ended up with a fire in the kitchen, and he had to cook them spaghetti to calm them down. Alec almost knocks off the table trying to play footsie with Magnus, and promptly turns red when everyone realizes exactly what happened. Raphael shares a story about the time Magnus tries to romance a folded carpet, and Alec, the loyal boyfriend, defends him throughout. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Just before dessert Clary and Isabelle disappear to the bathroom, and by the time they return, Simon is digging into his second slice of cake. Couple tiny flowers on Isabelle’s dress are torn, and Clary’s hair is as messy as she usually is in her studio. Nobody comments on the fact, but Jace quietly hands Simon five dollars as per the bet they had half an hour ago about at least one couple having a bathroom quickie.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s halfway through second round of dessert that Raphael stands up. “I have to go. I’ll meet you guys in two hours.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>After Raphael leaves, Magnus explains, “He has to pick Rosa up. She’s working overtime at the hospital, her shift ends in half an hour.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Dinner ends at around 9 pm, and after six proposals during the night in the tables around theirs, Simon can kill to get out of there. “Listen, I don’t have anything against proposals, or love, or proposals of love. I just can’t be in this place right now. It is freaking too cheesy. Even for me!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh good , you have a limit.” Jace rolls his eyes. “But yeah, I agree. Too much love in the air, sort of suffocating.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re just bitter Meliorn chose not to pursue the long distance thing when he went off to LA.” Isabelle points out, helping Clary put on her coat.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Meliorn? Like the Indie singer Meliorn?” Simon gawks at Jace. “Meliorn Seelieson?!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Or as I call him, my beer stealer.” Jace’s golden hair is like a halo in the neon lights outside the restaurant, and there’s a ball curling deep inside his heart as he stares at him, that smirk now a little more genuine than it was when the dinner started.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I can’t believe you dated Meliorn.” Jace frowns at Simon’s goofy smile, amused.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It was more of a friends-with-benefits thing really. Then he got a good deal at the- uh- you know the recording studio The Court?” Simon nods, and Jace continues, “Yeah, so he went to LA for that. I wanted to go the whole </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘I miss you’ ‘When are you coming back?’ </span>
  </em>
  <span>stuff. He didn’t. So, we broke up.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sorry man.” Jace recognizes the ingenuity in Simon’s eyes, and gives a tight lipped smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, I’ll live. What about you? No girlfriend? Or boyfriend? Sorry I’m assuming you’re not aro. Shit.” Jace grimaces. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m pan actually. And my girlfriend Maia broke up with me two weeks ago. She’s got a full ride to Stanford. Broke up with me before she went on a nature hike with her best friend Jordan.” Simon gives a sad smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, what you’re saying is, </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘your ex-girlfriend ‘s on a hunting trip, and hasn’t been home in a few weeks’</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Jace’s smirk dissolves into a full grin and Simon stares at him wide-eyed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Did you just make a </span>
  <em>
    <span>Supernatural </span>
  </em>
  <span>reference?!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jace shrugs effortlessly. “What can I say? I’m a sucker for the paranormal and brotherly love. Must run in the family.” He throws a wink at Simon, and Simon can only gape like a fish out of water.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jace Herondale. Making pop culture references. With </span>
  <em>
    <span>him.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Huh.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey!” Simon jerks around, and Helen and Aline come out of the alleyway. “We, uh,” Helen smiles at her wife, her blond hair in a dishevel, “We’re just gonna go home- for the- uh- the night- we’re just gonna-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know what? We’re married and in love and it’s freaking Valentine’s day so here’s the thing. I’m gonna go home with my gorgeous wife and ravish each other. See you guys next week. Don’t call us unless there’s someone dying.” Aline grins, linking an arm around Helen, and the two of them hail a cab.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So I guess it’s just the six of us.” Jace whistles.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“As much as I would love to go home and ravish my beautiful boyfriend, or have him ravish me, dealer’s choice,” Magnus’ smirk gets brighter at the keening noise Alec makes, “There’s a new place I wanted to visit. How do you feel about a little fairytale love?” Magnus winks.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re kidding me!” Isabelle almost shrieks, startling Clary who had been kissing her cheek. “Magnus Bane, are you telling me you scored the tickets of </span>
  <em>
    <span>the </span>
  </em>
  <span>hottest Valentine’s Day themed club in the city?!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Leave it to Magnus and Izzy to find out a fairytale themed club of all things.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Aren’t we supposed to be meeting Raphael later? I mean, no way he’s gonna meet us in a club. A romantic, couple-filled, fairytale themed club of all.” Simon shrugs, and Jace points a finger at his way, nodding along.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t worry, we’ll be back soon, or we could text him to meet us someplace nearby.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>_____________________________________</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It is ridiculous the amount of times Simon has looked back and thought “</span>
  <em>
    <span>how did I end up here</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” It’s usually followed by the thought, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>It seemed like a good idea at the time.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The purple and pink glow of the neon sign outside the club, Pandemonium, seemed ethereal from some angles. They definitely nailed the fairy part, because the entrance is decorated by giant gingerbread door, and there’s forest vines tangled throughout. The rules are apparently that couples are to be assigned a single fairytale, and they have to play those roles until they left the club or choose a different story.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span> Magnus walks in like he does everything else, with swagger of a rockstar and grace of a cat, Alec at his side, the proud boyfriend, confidence oozing off of the two of them. The usher gives them a bowl to pick a paper from, and apparently, they get to be Cinderella and Prince Charming, which apparently, from Magnus’ glee, would be the perfect fit. Alec takes a glittery set of shoes, the complimentary items for being the Gay Cinderella for the night apparently, and Magnus picks out the perfect crown for himself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Next, Izzy and Clary walk in, hand in hand, and Izzy picks out a piece of paper held between her glittery blood red fingernails. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Snow White</span>
  </em>
  <span>. The usher sends them inside quickly, half mortified they might skip to the end of the story right there at the door.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Which one of you gentlemen would like to choose?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon jerks his head to his left, to look at Jace who shares his shocked expression, just for a moment, before it goes back to being the same old cocky smirk.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, honeyboo,” Jace smiles sweetly at Simon, almost too sweetly if Simon thought about it, his voice full of that same mischief when he talked at dinner about pranking Alec when they were teenagers, “Would you like to pick it?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Okay. Two can play at this game.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh my Huggy Bear, I can’t take that from you.” Simon makes a face, “I know how much you love these things, my Poodle-oodle.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jace smiles at him, even though his eyes stare daggers, and goes up to the usher.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Rapunzel.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon has to physically restrain himself from doubling over when the usher notes that Jace would make a good Rapunzel with his blond hair.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Rapunzel wishes she could have my hair!” Jace grumbles as they enters the club.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Really? So much pride as a fake blond?” If glares could kill, Simon must have turned into a vampire, </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>gotten staked several times tonight.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“For the record, my hair is naturally blond.” It isn’t quite arrogance in Jace’s voice, more like teasing, his mismatched eyes almost...</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Flirty?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, you wanna go up the tower? Or do I need to find a wig?” Simon eyes the makeshift tower facade around one of the staircases. “Aw hell.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” Jace turns around, coming face to face with his brother and Magnus making out against one of the fake fireplaces.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Um, are they aware Cinderella lost only the shoe and not almost the entire wardrobe? Why are they-oh my God!” Simon looks horrified.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wow!” Jace grins as Alec pins Magnus against the wall, “Alec’s got </span>
  <em>
    <span>game</span>
  </em>
  <span>!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ok I’m gonna pretend like they’re not basically having sex and instead have some fun myself, what about you?” Simon jerks his chin at Jace, who nods.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh stranger, my stranger. Wouldn’t you save me from my tower? From the clutches of the evil Father –uh- Gothel? -ion?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Gothelion? Dude, what the hell?” Simon clutches his stomach to stop doubling over.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I panicked okay?” Jace gives Simon a fond eyeroll. “Like you can come up with better ideas on the drop of a hat!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure I can! Darth Valenothel, Lord Valenmort, Valenificent, I could go on and on and on.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Title of your sex tape!” Jace gives a shit eating grin.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Supernatural, Brooklyn Nine Nine, </span>
  </em>
  <span>dude who </span>
  <em>
    <span>are </span>
  </em>
  <span>you? And what have you done to Jace ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>Why didn’t the Doctor just go back to save Amy and Rory’ </span>
  </em>
  <span>Herondale?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh baby I’m just full of surprises!” Jace winks. “And why the hell didn’t he?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know,” Simon grumbles. “Now get your ass up in the tower!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey! I’m a Prince! Show some respect!” Jace shudders in mock-offense.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh I’m sorry. Get thine glorious ass up on thine tower, my liege.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Damn right it’s glorious.” Jace grins at Simon before climbing the stairs, literally. Simon stares as the blond grabs a rail, and hauls himself up on the platform by it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You could have just taken the stairs, you know. Why are you so extra?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Extra is my middle name!” Jace grins from the top of the tower, the neon lights like making his golden hair look like a halo behind his head. “Come on, you love it!”</span>
</p>
<p><span>“No, I don’t.” Simon lies. </span><em><span>He does.</span></em> <em><span>Holy Castiel on a cracker he loves it.</span></em></p>
<p>
  <span>“O my weirdly nerd hot stranger, when will thou rescue me from my- um- cardboard tower?” Jace is barely managing not to crack up, and Simon shakes his head.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know if this was a fan fic, this wouldn’t even be a fluffy one, ‘cause this is straight up crack, man.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shhh! Shut up and come here to save me,” Jace hurries, almost comically. Simon looks around.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay I can’t just save you bare-handed!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just come up here! I’ll teach you moves!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon tries to climb the tower, and it collapses. On him. With Jace, who shrieks and laughs and Simon feels like his stomach’s gonna hurt the next day with all that laughing.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>___________________________________</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It isn’t a surprise that they get thrown out from </span>
  <em>
    <span>Pandemonium</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sometime during the hour, Magnus and Alec had gone home, Izzy informed them, just before she and Clary giggled their way home, leaving Simon and Jace behind.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ok, what do you wanna do now?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon turns around, and Jace is standing there, hands in his jacket. “Well, it </span>
  <em>
    <span>is </span>
  </em>
  <span>Valentine’s Day.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, and?” Jace looks like a confused golden retriever, and Simon smiles a little.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Trust me?” Simon asks. Jace looks perplexed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“There’s a voice in the back of my head saying I probably don’t, but, God help me, I trust you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon smiles, and drags Jace into the shop nearby, his eyes scanning the shelves methodically, until it rests on a single item.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon picks up the sword from its holder, and hands it to Jace, hilt up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, every Prince and Princess and non-binary Royal locked in a tower should have a sword, right?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jace looks like he just got beamed up into the floors of the </span>
  <em>
    <span>Enterprise</span>
  </em>
  <span>, or at least the Jace-equivalent of that emotion anyway. He takes the sword, swinging it around a couple time expertly, because of course Jace Herondale would know how to handle a sword. Simon suppresses a fond eye-roll.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jace swings the sword, before pinning Simon to the nearest counter, the sword placed under his chin. This way, Simon can count the flecks in Jace’s eyes. They are close, closer than Simon has been with him ever, and his breath hitches.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You really shouldn’t to hand a sword to just anyone, you know. Besides, if this was Viking era, you just proposed to me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon feels like he can stay like this forever, just keep listening to this ridiculous, absolutely horrible, no-good boy who quotes TV shows, and plays piano, and wears leather jackets. Who gets offended being called a fake blond. Who makes a hotter Rapunzel than Mandy Moore. Who loves swords as much as he loves pranking his brother. Who gets scared shitless by baby ducks. Who looks at Simon and Simon gets this weird feeling in his stomach that makes him all warm and tingly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And well, no one has ever said that Simon Lewis is good at impulse control. So he does something extremely Simon-like.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He kisses Jace.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>He </span>
  </em>
  <span>kisses Jace.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>He </span>
  </em>
  <span>kisses </span>
  <em>
    <span>Jace freaking Herondale.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shit.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>No wait. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jace is kissing him back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Jace </span>
  </em>
  <span>is kissing </span>
  <em>
    <span>him </span>
  </em>
  <span>back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>JACE IS KISSING HIM BACK!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Holy shit!” Simon breathes shallow as he gasps, his mouth inches from Jace’s. Jace is smiling, beaming more like, his eyes reflecting the shop’s lights, making them seem like they’re as golden as heaven’s fire.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I can’t believe it took you all night to do it!” Jace smirks. “Thought you’d never get the courage.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Well, if there’s one thing Simon has learned during this night, it’s the fact that Jace is a smart-mouth. So he does the only thing he can do in his position.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He kisses him again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ay Dios Mio! You two as well? That’s it, I’m never coming to dinner with you all again.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon and Jace catch Raphael standing in the entryway of the shop, scowling at them. But his face can’t hide the fact that he’s happy for them, especially when a smile flashes briefly at them, before a scowl replaces it again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t break up, or Magnus will drag me to two separate dinners.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure Clary and Izzy will kill us before that.” Jace breathes, still grinning.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh shit!” Simon puts his head on Jace’s shoulder.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Can you imagine all the </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘I told you he’s lovely’ </span>
  </em>
  <span>I’m gonna have to endure?” Simon whines.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jace, being Jace, says something extremely Jace-like. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You think I’m lovely?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Great, now both his best friend and his new boyfriend are insufferable idiots.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His </span>
  <em>
    <span>insufferable idiots.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simon’s heart flutters like a caged butterfly.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thoughts?<br/>Tell me in the comments or find me on tumblr @christopher-lightwood-my-heart</p></blockquote></div></div>
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